Mother of the Bride

Planning a wedding takes A LOT of time and effort, but I'm truly enjoying every element and avenue.  Tom has been a saint, and he's a self admitted "metro sexual" (HA!) because not only does he enjoy, but he happily chauffeurs me around to craft stores and the wedding venue, tags along to view floral arrangements, etc...in short,  he's one hundred percent hands on part of the planning, and I couldn't be more grateful!  See, we view this blessed event as a once in a lifetime thing we get to play a part in-and even though it's not our wedding, it is "our" wedding.  Sure, we aren't the bride and groom, and if it were my wedding, there would be much more pink and pastels; yet I'm becoming an expert at finding navy blue and red ...err...I mean "apple and marine" colored accents, and again, having a ball doing so.  Just this past week I found the cutest "LOVE" sign-complete with red glitter (yep! Red glitter!) for our candy bar table-it's perfect.  And speaking of candy, I've accumulated a stockpile to make a fat kid (or PMS'ing mid 40's aged woman...eh hem...) proud; did you know chocolate will stay fresh for over a year if kept at room temperature? Well it will, trust me, I've researched.  So KK's old bedroom has become part candy store, filled with plastic bins of navy blue and white M&M's, red gumballs, flower shaped suckers, five pound bags of navy blue foil wrapped mints, Pixie Stix (who doesn't love a Pixie Stick??), and various other chocolate and sugar laden treats.  In addition, there's boxes of table runners, chair sashes, silk flowers (ok these I bought on a whim, and kind of regret doing so..but they seemed so perfect at the time and were on sale-so I bought fifty adorable little silk rose arrangements...ugh...check out Craigslist if you're looking for a really good deal on red and white silk rose miniatures...lol!). And because we are having real flowers, the vases.  Alllllll the vases.  This past August my BFF Trish and I moved her daughter Rachel, who is also in the wedding, into her dorm at college.  When we were finished, we hit the nearest Salvation Army and hit pay dirt! We found fifty some matching glass vases including a few navy blue and red colored ones, and filled her SUV with our treasure trove.  Well, these have sat up in the wedding storeroom until today, when I have ran two loads through my dishwasher, and have been hand washing the rest, then painstakingly packing them in boxes I labeled for the florists (my brother and a friend/neighbor) to have at it.  And the best part? Since I'm not renting (heck, I bought the vases for a mere buck a piece!), I can send beautiful flowers home with thirty-some lucky guests.  Buh bye, enjoy the pretty flowers, and thanks for coming! Perfect.

I can't post without writing something about my never ending exercise and dieting, and this wedding is a huge motivator in my most recent endeavor to lose weight. I love my classes and training sessions, but when I stepped on the scales this past Monday, I've gained weight.  DANG IT!!!  Sigh.  Sigh.  Sighhhhhhhhh..... It is what it is.  I was going to give up wine and all alcoholic beverages, and made it one whole day...uh yeah, not happening.  I LOVE my wine.  So last night, I treated myself to one measly four ounce glass (why even bother??) then went to bed.  Today when the vases are all washed and packed, and the house is passably clean (and I use this term loosely), I'll either take a killer "bells, ropes and whistles" class, do a Jillian or another challenging DVD, or my eliptical or treadmill, I'm not stopping even though I've GAINED weight! 

To wrap it up, I'm up and at 'em, ready to post this blog, squeeze in a workout after taking Hampton to school and before I go to work.  Michigan has been in her true form: the week started out with no school due to an ice day, days later I was in just long sleeves and a vest as I walked Pete and Belle a few miles, which they LOVED (and so did I, treadmill walking/running stinks-it was so nice to be outside), now today the forecast is calling for more snow.  I keep reminding myself that it is only February, but still, we are inching closer to spring-and what a spring this is going to be! 

Since I started this draft, I've let another five days lapse; in this time, I (HIP HIP...HURRAY!!) SOLD the silk miniatures on Craigslist-and let me just say, shame on the guy who actually made me feel sorry for him, with his Hispanic last name and "we're having a sweet 16 party for our daughter, and are on a VERY tight budget but reeeeaaaallly want these flowers, so will you take $85 instead of $110"? So of course I do, and meeting him in a public parking lot, the guy pulls up in a brand new Jeep Wrangler (as I'm in my crappy old mini van), and he's wearing the newest design 'North Face' jacket (I'm in KK's old hand me down purple Nike)...pisses me off! But It's $85 towards the wedding, and this will pay for two more guests meals.  And while I'm on the subject of money...let me back up and tie it in with a country song (a big preceding apology to my sister Lori whom I know is gagging at the mere mention of "country song"...but it's perfect...) of the Judd's (Wynona needs to take a bells, ropes and whistles class...just saying...) "Guardian Angels" which goes like this:  A hundred year old photograph stares out from a frame, and if you look real close you'll see, our eyes are just the same...  This song speaks VOLUMES to me, because I have two phenomenal guardian angels (and after a visit to a psychic?  I have NO DOUBT they do indeed watch over me...but that's another blog...) and you had better believe I do indeed have hundred year old photographs of my angels, and I tell them I miss and love them all the time. Both my grandma Gremore and Hampton would be, and I know they are, proud.  They would also shit a brick (my sweet grandma Hampton would wash my mouth out with soap for swearing, my sweet grandma Gremore said "shit" all the time, LOL!) to know how pathetic many of this generation are, the mere laziness and entitlement-I gasp at what young moms are asking for these days.  It's not been that long ago when I lived it a trailer park as a teenage mother who took NOT ONE DIME of public assistance (GASP! IMAGINE THIS??!!) and Tom and I paid our own bills.  My kids were the BEST dressed kids in Clarkston, and guess what? I cleaned a children's clothing store AND the owners personal residence to pay for the clothes.  I read on Facebook of mothers flat out asking for handouts-who don't work- and want to SCREAM!! It's disgusting, and shame on them.  I truly hope I've raised a harder working daughter (and sons), who will also make Lucille Gremore and Emily Elizabeth Hampton proud.  My grandma Hampton walked to a bus stop in Pontiac to get to work- cleaning office buildings at night, and gave birth to nine children (and buried two under the age of seven!), Grandma Gremore worked just as hard and neither had ANY luxuries...and this is an understatement.  But what these incredible women instilled in me?  Priceless. A big shout out to my own mother who, when times got tough, as a mother of four, started driving a school bus in her forties in order to help pay the bills...

So as mother of the bride...KK, if you're reading this, keep working hard; we are so proud of you. You're going to have a beautiful wedding, and you deserve it! 

Like a train wreck...

I hopped back onto Facebook for the sole purpose to let my "community" know I didn't delete any of them; truth be told, there are a few people on my friends list I really would like to nix, but I don't want to hurt someones feelings, so they remain. Yet even though I posted a status that I would be deactivating my Facebook account, twice last week while subbing, I ran into acquaintances who asked "why did you delete me"? This made me feel really bad, so I logged back on to post the link to this blog (which I did before I deactivated assuming it would be seen, but I guess not) and a status stating no one was axed. Like a train wreck, while back on Facebook to post said status, I couldn't help but look, and as I scrolled, I realized out of all of my "friends", there's only a few dozen whom I actually miss. Let me be clear; I like these people, every single one I've accepted into my Facebook friends list...however, many of them?  I liked a whole lot more before I grew to "know" them so well on Facebook. Undoubtedly, people feel the same way about me, and God knows I've been deleted by quite a few. For example, my own  dad has me blocked because he claims my at times "colorful" language gives him chest pains! And Dad is someone I deleted because he is someone I love dearly, but his constant (and I mean coooooooonnnnnnstaaaaaant....) political rants, in addition to his public reprimanding me as if I'm a child and not a 44 year old woman; like when I would post on a Sunday morning that I was enjoying coffee in bed, and he'd comment "what time is CHURCH"?? You get the picture. 

Back to my point, I simply can't believe what some people post for all to see/read and I either laugh at their stupidity or simply shake my head.  My biggest irritation is the individuals who need a reality check-please, post a real photo of yourself, not an Instagramed enhanced that looks nothing like you, or how about the ones who update their profile pictures on a weekly (some every other day or even daily) basis?  We get it-your're beautiful (or at least your cropped/photo shopped picture is...LOL!)!  And if life were as peachy perfect as you portray on Facebook, you'd live in Utopia. My favorites are the real, genuine posts; the moms who tell it like it is, who admit their kids drive them insane (yes, I do this), and the statuses that make me literally laugh out loud. My favorite posts are of the pets...I'm a sucker for animals, and Facebook is in fact responsible for a few pet adoptions I've been truly honored to be a part of. But back to what I don't like about Facebook; this past presidential election about put me over the edge, and I couldn't believe how MEAN people emerged and showed themselves to be.  I didn't vote for Barack Obama, and anyone who knows me knows this, but I never called anyone an idiot who did vote Democratic. The election is something I could give a myriad of examples of Facebook fodder, but will leave it be. How about those who post every single night what they prepared for dinner? Every. Single. Night. Keep in mind, I'm fully aware I'm fair game and am certain I've irritated a few (or several) with my bluntness, and perhaps the picture I posted as a "before" shot-in a bikini nonetheless, had many shaking their heads, but hey, it was NOT photo shopped.  At all.  Finally, the "hinting" or some downright asking for handouts.  My biggest pet peeve, hands down. I'll leave it at that.  Being off Facebook has been hard, I'm not going to lie, I do miss it.  However, I'm missing it less each day, and may even print all of the photo albums I've created and shared to a disc, and deactivate permanently.  We shall see...does anyone else feel the way I do? I'm truly interested in hearing your take on the subject.

Also like a train wreck, my obsession with getting back in shape.  I don't want to be unrealistic, and will be very happy with losing 20 pounds, and I'm really working on it.  I know I won't ever look like I did in my twenties, and like most women, I look back at pictures of myself from this time in my life and shake my head at the recollection that I actually thought I was fat back then; now I'd give blood to look like I did when I thought I was "fat"-why are we so critical of ourselves?  So last week during our weekly training session with Mike, who tortured us (and I mean tortured us!!), I informed him to not take it personally when I gave him the middle finger, because Wendy, Tara and I were all on our period and kind of grumpy.  Mike replied it's okay because we are still way nicer to him than many of his clients, so I'll take this as a compliment-even if the poor guy was given more information than he cared to or needed to hear.

So yes, bikini season will be here before I know it, but I'm working out and eating healthier for a much more important occasion than vacation; I'm striving to look good in a beautiful dress that truth be told only showcases my arms...my mother of the bride dress! It's a gorgeous, navy blue gown that's sleeveless and beaded, and I can only thank my 'sister' Lori for showing it to me-and it's perfect.  Planning a wedding has been stressful, but such a fun and truly joyous time in my life.  And the simple fact that my daughter is to the depths of her soul happy, makes me euphoric! We all want our kids to be happy, and I can honestly say God has answered this prayer of mine, and put Joe in AmyKaye's life, and in a few short months a part of our family. I'm not a big Carrie Underwood fan per say, but her song "Mama's Song" is in fact my ring tone for when KK calls me, because Joe really is, as the song says, sooooo goooood to her-I can hardly listen to the song without tearing up. And my true feelings emerge when I think of the girls who were so cruel to KK during junior high (aren't girls just horrible? And I'm just going to say it, shame on the mothers who brush this off and tolerate it as "normal" teenage behavior...here's a newsflash; your daughters are MEAN and bitchy-shame on you!!), well fast forward a decade-who's life is better now? KK's.  If there's a mom reading this now who is dealing with the heartache of watching her daughter hurt from the cruel words, exclusion, and actions of mean girls, it does all work out when our girls remain true to themselves.  I promise. 
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bpFW4Yhy08k

I wish everyone a happy weekend, and hope in the big picture of life, things work out for the best. I say this because I watch helplessly as a few individuals I love so dearly deal with constant ill treatment and are literally heaped with disrespect and flat out cruelness (flashbacks to KK's junior high years...and it's really just like watching mean adolescents)...again...like a train wreck, I watch, and wish I could look away... Just remember,again, when you're true to yourself all things work out for the best, and the truth prevails. Now for a glass of wine (I swear I saved calories for the indulgence!), and with a snuggled kitty on my lap, I'm going to relax with my sons, and count my blessings. And try to not sneak on Facebook.

Friendship isn't a big thing - it's a million little things. ~Author Unknown

I spent last weekend with my dear friend, Nickie, at her cottage in north/eastern Michigan.  Heading to Caseville has become somewhat of a traditional girls getaway, and I look forward to our husband and kid free retreat.  Last week could not fly by fast enough, and come Friday, our day of departure, I simply was giddy with anticipation. After work I hurried home and packed all the necessities, of course the main "necessity" was WINE...because when Nickie and I get together, we talk...and drink...a lot.  We are both huge wine lovers, and the thought of late night gab sessions complete with vino, movies, magazines, and of course laughter, well bottles of red and white just complete the perfect scenario.

The three of us at Nickie's 50th birthday.

Heading to Caseville, we were a little sad due to the fact one of our longtime and very good friends had for the second time in a row, backed out of our time away.  Lets face it, ALL women are busy, and especially so if said woman is a wife, mother, and holds down a job either inside or out of the home.  Nickie is a probation officer, and I'm a full time substitute teacher.  Our friend, whom shall remain nameless, also works full time outside of her home, and is a fantastic mom, and has recently been dealing with a health crisis of a family member who thank God is doing well. Yet she declined joining us because her kids had things going on over the weekend.  So did mine.  So did Nickie's. Why is it we feel guilty leaving our families for a few measly days?  Why is it that...oh yes...this is my inner dilemma; I DO NOT feel guilty.  At all. In fact, When Nickie pulled into my driveway Friday afternoon, I kissed Tom and Hampton goodbye and no exaggeration, literally sprinted into her SUV with eager abandon.  I mean, it's not that I don't love my family, because I do-with all of my heart and soul.  They also irritate the shit out of me (at times) and I know with also all of my heart, that getting away from them for a few sacred days makes me beyond a shadow of a doubt, a better wife and mother.

First sight I see on Saturday morning...

Two and a half hours later, we were seated in a booth at the little bar a few miles south of Nickie's cottage where we always stop for dinner.  Drinking wine and margaritas, we continued conversation which hadn't stopped since we left Clarkston-I mean, there's always so much to catch up on, and I really hadn't spent quality time with Nickie since our last getaway in August. After dinner (and drinks) we headed to the cottage, where the furnace pilot light was off, but nothing a phone call to hubby and a youtube tutorial couldn't quickly fix, and soon we were uncorking a bottle of wine (duh...), getting into our jammies, and more gabbing ensued. I don't think we nodded off until 4 a.m., but around 9 a.m., we were both up and drinking coffee (...okay, mixed with RumChata-a gift from my friend Trish; I mean have you ever tasted RumChata? Well if not, you really should, it's liquid heaven), reading, Pinteresting, I think (okay I know) comparing wrinkles, beauty regimes, and our boobs (mine are bigger, hers are perkier. WAY perkier. But I'm the only one who actually showed her actual boobs...).  Soon we were dressed and shopping the entire afternoon-shopping in resale shops, and adorable little boutiques, and a quick stop for some groceries where I kind of shocked the poor cashier with my unfiltered vocabulary...see she was an employee at a restaurant north of Caseville for decades, and truly considered herself family...but when the owner closed down and demolished the waterfront property, and built a mansion (and I mean a MANSION), she was given a mediocre grade wristwatch-and that's it.  I told her what I thought of this and she gasped, but said she thought the exact same thing.  Anyway...Nickie and I wound up at this unique and fabulous restaurant, which is also tradition, and ordered a fantastic dinner and, you guessed it, more wine (again..duh...).  And our dessert?  Ice cream Hummers.  Dee-lish.  And fattening. But we made up for it on Sunday afternoon by walking miles on the beach, talking non stop of course.

Walking on the shores of Lake Huron

When it was time to head back to Clarkston, after a homemade and if I do say so myself AWESOME lunch (okay, yes, we had a glass of wine too!), we packed the car and were on the road, neither of us wanting to go home.  Is this bad? I don't think so.  Honestly? I think we can lose ourselves, that women become so indebted to our families that we truly forget who we are; I thank God for my fantastic husband, who really makes it possible for me to get away for these quick weekends.  And I love my three kids so much I would literally die for either of them, I really would.  But I also love my true friends so much, and know genuine friends are a gift from God, and like any relationship, friendships need to be cultivated.  I can count on one hand my closest and dearest friends-add one who is so close she's my "sister";  You know who you are.  If you're one of my friends, and are doing me the honor of reading this blog, please know I am so thankful for you. Each and every one of you. And thanks Nickie, for a wonderful, and much needed time away, for making me feel so welcome and comfortable in your adorable home away from home-I count the days until our next toast to Caseville!

No ifs, ands, or butts...

"I love you with all of my butt; I would have said 'all of my heart', but my butt is bigger".  Since I haven't been Facebooking, I'm Pinteresting more these days which truly is way less time consuming, for me anyways. On Pinterest, the quotes board is one of my favorites, and I laughed out loud as I pinned  "all of my butt" because it so appropriately pertains to me.  But the good news is Tom, my boyfriend and husband of 27 years, happens to like my large derriere (I had to google how to spell that), so I'm not to bothered by it.  However I am bothered with being so vertically challenged-I'm five feet.  Exactly five feet tall.  No matter how hard I try to stretch myself, I'm exactly five feet tall, and at 160 pounds, it's not all aesthetically pleasing. Although, I will say in my defense, and God knows I need one, I can carry off 140 pounds and look perfectly fine. I'm an active gal and happen to truly enjoy exercising, particularly running-perhaps I more enjoy the conversations spoken during the long miles, along with the yummy and well earned lunches when said long runs are completed? I have the BEST running buddies, and I treasure our times pounding the pavement and trails; this hasn't happened lately due to crazy work schedules (I miss you AnneMarie and Cinda!). But (no pun intended) I am plain old fat right now, and to combat this dilemma, I've not only been on a healthier eating plan, I also hired a trainer. I love my trainer, Mike.  He's a kid really, I'm plenty old enough to be his mom; this being said, he's very cute, in a boyish way. And he kicks. my. butt. My butt which I told him very clearly that I do not want to lose. And he (ASS)sured me I will not lose all of my inches in one region, so it's all good. I feel terribly guilty spending money on what seems to be an extravagance, but decided I rarely do much for myself, and what I'm paying for this once a week butt kicking session is less than what I formerly spent on wine! And once again, my fantastic girlfriends to the rescue-Tara and Wendy arose to the challenge and commited to join my weekly session which greatly reduces the cost, as we are now a group session, and we have FUN while sweating and moaning (okay that sounded kind of kinky...!!).  We work very hard and encourage each other, we also laugh. A lot. I'm not entirely sure poor Mike knows how to respond when I pull up my shirt and 
say "I hate this cellulite on my stomach and want it GONE"! Or when one of us admits we may have 
peed a little (...yes, it happens); Tara even warned us she sometimes farts while doing abdominal exercises, BAHHHH HAAA HAAA!! Well, she's honest. As I'm laughing like a third grader (because Tara said "fart") Mike is completely unphased, in fact he doesn't miss a beat as he tells us while training, some people have let one fly-in his face. And he must remain professional because "it just happens". Eww. Tara is a physical therapist and completely relates to Mike's dilemma, and Wendy is a midwife who has delivered hundreds of babies, so I can only imagine what she has endured (and again...Eww). Yet together, we are a determined force to be reckoned, and share a common goal. Additionally, all three of us admit if we weren't committed as a group, we most likely would not show up every week. 
     Because I'm heading up north for a much needed getaway with my longtime dear friend, Nickie, I won't be training this weekend. However, AnneMarie stepped up to the challenge and met with Mike and me on Thursday night...thank God for girlfriends-and cute trainers.

Hello 2013, goodbye Facebook...at least for a few months._

At restaurants. While my family is having conversations. Riding as a passenger in a car, or when I am driving myself but stopped at red lights. Commercial breaks from favorite television shows.  Waiting in line at the bank. Soaking in my beloved bubble baths. Standing on my porch while Pete and Belle take a potty break.  At the gym while I'm actually running on a treadmill or sweating it out on an elliptical machine. Waiting on the laundry (and I mean while standing in front of the washing machine waiting for the spin cycle to finish; God forbid I'd let two minutes pass!). On the toilet...okay, this last event may be a bit to much information, but these are just a few of the daily events occurring in my life, occurring with me personally, as I check or post to my Facebook page. iPhone in hand at all times, it had become a major problem, dare I say an addiction, and I had to tackle it before it grew out of hand-so as of New Years Eve, I deactivated my Facebook account.  Or I should say temporarily did so, for at least three months. Anyone who is a part of my life knows me to be somewhat of a passionate person. In the movie (my favorite movie of all time by the way) Gone With The Wind, sweet, serene,  Melanie Wilkes comes to feisty Katie Scarlett O'Hara's defense and declares that Scarlett isn't the troublemaker she is in fact being accused, but that she is rather "high spirited, and vivacious"...I like to think the same adjectives describe yours truly. I say this because really, in no matter what I do or take on in life, I give it my all. For example, when I started running to alleviate the stress and frustration from dealing with my parents divorce after 39 years of marriage, I trained for and ran the Nashville marathon. Graduating high school with an embarrassingly low GPA (but God did I have FUN!!), at the age of 30 I figured I'd try college (and what the heck, have another baby too!) and graduated Cum Laude. I love my job as a substitute teacher, and my students indeed refer to me as "enthusiastic". Wine is a passion and I was absolutely afraid I would have a problem cutting back on the vino, but after day five of no Pinot Noir I had one glass and did just fine; I think I can go without Facebook...for three months anyway.  Keeping my fingers crossed, and in the meantime, this blog will have to suffice my "fan base".  Wishing you all a very happy, and more importantly, healthy, 2013.
Love, Lynnie