Like a train wreck...

I hopped back onto Facebook for the sole purpose to let my "community" know I didn't delete any of them; truth be told, there are a few people on my friends list I really would like to nix, but I don't want to hurt someones feelings, so they remain. Yet even though I posted a status that I would be deactivating my Facebook account, twice last week while subbing, I ran into acquaintances who asked "why did you delete me"? This made me feel really bad, so I logged back on to post the link to this blog (which I did before I deactivated assuming it would be seen, but I guess not) and a status stating no one was axed. Like a train wreck, while back on Facebook to post said status, I couldn't help but look, and as I scrolled, I realized out of all of my "friends", there's only a few dozen whom I actually miss. Let me be clear; I like these people, every single one I've accepted into my Facebook friends list...however, many of them?  I liked a whole lot more before I grew to "know" them so well on Facebook. Undoubtedly, people feel the same way about me, and God knows I've been deleted by quite a few. For example, my own  dad has me blocked because he claims my at times "colorful" language gives him chest pains! And Dad is someone I deleted because he is someone I love dearly, but his constant (and I mean coooooooonnnnnnstaaaaaant....) political rants, in addition to his public reprimanding me as if I'm a child and not a 44 year old woman; like when I would post on a Sunday morning that I was enjoying coffee in bed, and he'd comment "what time is CHURCH"?? You get the picture. 

Back to my point, I simply can't believe what some people post for all to see/read and I either laugh at their stupidity or simply shake my head.  My biggest irritation is the individuals who need a reality check-please, post a real photo of yourself, not an Instagramed enhanced that looks nothing like you, or how about the ones who update their profile pictures on a weekly (some every other day or even daily) basis?  We get it-your're beautiful (or at least your cropped/photo shopped picture is...LOL!)!  And if life were as peachy perfect as you portray on Facebook, you'd live in Utopia. My favorites are the real, genuine posts; the moms who tell it like it is, who admit their kids drive them insane (yes, I do this), and the statuses that make me literally laugh out loud. My favorite posts are of the pets...I'm a sucker for animals, and Facebook is in fact responsible for a few pet adoptions I've been truly honored to be a part of. But back to what I don't like about Facebook; this past presidential election about put me over the edge, and I couldn't believe how MEAN people emerged and showed themselves to be.  I didn't vote for Barack Obama, and anyone who knows me knows this, but I never called anyone an idiot who did vote Democratic. The election is something I could give a myriad of examples of Facebook fodder, but will leave it be. How about those who post every single night what they prepared for dinner? Every. Single. Night. Keep in mind, I'm fully aware I'm fair game and am certain I've irritated a few (or several) with my bluntness, and perhaps the picture I posted as a "before" shot-in a bikini nonetheless, had many shaking their heads, but hey, it was NOT photo shopped.  At all.  Finally, the "hinting" or some downright asking for handouts.  My biggest pet peeve, hands down. I'll leave it at that.  Being off Facebook has been hard, I'm not going to lie, I do miss it.  However, I'm missing it less each day, and may even print all of the photo albums I've created and shared to a disc, and deactivate permanently.  We shall see...does anyone else feel the way I do? I'm truly interested in hearing your take on the subject.

Also like a train wreck, my obsession with getting back in shape.  I don't want to be unrealistic, and will be very happy with losing 20 pounds, and I'm really working on it.  I know I won't ever look like I did in my twenties, and like most women, I look back at pictures of myself from this time in my life and shake my head at the recollection that I actually thought I was fat back then; now I'd give blood to look like I did when I thought I was "fat"-why are we so critical of ourselves?  So last week during our weekly training session with Mike, who tortured us (and I mean tortured us!!), I informed him to not take it personally when I gave him the middle finger, because Wendy, Tara and I were all on our period and kind of grumpy.  Mike replied it's okay because we are still way nicer to him than many of his clients, so I'll take this as a compliment-even if the poor guy was given more information than he cared to or needed to hear.

So yes, bikini season will be here before I know it, but I'm working out and eating healthier for a much more important occasion than vacation; I'm striving to look good in a beautiful dress that truth be told only showcases my arms...my mother of the bride dress! It's a gorgeous, navy blue gown that's sleeveless and beaded, and I can only thank my 'sister' Lori for showing it to me-and it's perfect.  Planning a wedding has been stressful, but such a fun and truly joyous time in my life.  And the simple fact that my daughter is to the depths of her soul happy, makes me euphoric! We all want our kids to be happy, and I can honestly say God has answered this prayer of mine, and put Joe in AmyKaye's life, and in a few short months a part of our family. I'm not a big Carrie Underwood fan per say, but her song "Mama's Song" is in fact my ring tone for when KK calls me, because Joe really is, as the song says, sooooo goooood to her-I can hardly listen to the song without tearing up. And my true feelings emerge when I think of the girls who were so cruel to KK during junior high (aren't girls just horrible? And I'm just going to say it, shame on the mothers who brush this off and tolerate it as "normal" teenage behavior...here's a newsflash; your daughters are MEAN and bitchy-shame on you!!), well fast forward a decade-who's life is better now? KK's.  If there's a mom reading this now who is dealing with the heartache of watching her daughter hurt from the cruel words, exclusion, and actions of mean girls, it does all work out when our girls remain true to themselves.  I promise. 
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bpFW4Yhy08k

I wish everyone a happy weekend, and hope in the big picture of life, things work out for the best. I say this because I watch helplessly as a few individuals I love so dearly deal with constant ill treatment and are literally heaped with disrespect and flat out cruelness (flashbacks to KK's junior high years...and it's really just like watching mean adolescents)...again...like a train wreck, I watch, and wish I could look away... Just remember,again, when you're true to yourself all things work out for the best, and the truth prevails. Now for a glass of wine (I swear I saved calories for the indulgence!), and with a snuggled kitty on my lap, I'm going to relax with my sons, and count my blessings. And try to not sneak on Facebook.